Category: Parenting

The Irony Of Wanting Abortion Rights As We Celebrate Mother’s Day

DebbieLynne KespertLeave a comment
Roe v. Motherhood

Tuesday night Fox News kept showing footage of angry protesters (mostly young women in less than modest attire) outside the Supreme Court building demanding that the justices not overturn Roe v. Wade. I wasn’t really surprised, but I still felt sad that they couldn’t understand that abortion takes the lives of the most vulnerable and innocent human beings. I also felt angered by their obvious selfishness. Essentially, they want sexual pleasure without its consequential responsibilities.

How odd to watch such a display mere days before Mother’s Day. Does anyone else see the irony of it? The commercials bookending shots of the protesters showed airbrushed images of devoted mothers who clearly cherished their children, urging fathers to buy them roses, chocolate and jewelry as tokens of appreciation. The mothers in the commercials clearly glowed with joy over the privilege of having brought little lives into the world. How different from the young women outside the Supreme Court who demanded to destroy their children before those children were even born!

Motherhood sometimes is inconvenient and difficult, certainly. Airbrushed commercials neglect to mention the countless sacrifices women make in order to bear and raise children. Please understand that I don’t ignore the truth that moms go through a lot of hardships and disappointments. Perhaps many of those protesters fear the challenges of motherhood precisely for those reasons. But, while I don’t want to minimize the downside of being a mom, I think it’s important to remember what Scripture teaches about children.

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Can Childless Women Enjoy Mother’s Day?

DebbieLynne Kespert1 Comment

She couldn’t face hearing the Mother’s Day sermon that year. Her doctors had confirmed a few months earlier that they had no treatment for her type of infertility. Adoption agencies insisted that her husband was too old for them to adopt. So she spent that Mother’s Day (and subsequent Mother’s Days) curled up in her bed, weeping over the children she’d never have.

She and her husband were, for many years, two of my closest friends, so I sympathized with their grief as they sympathized with my grief over being unmarried. I had avoided weddings in earlier years, so I well understood why Mother’s Day services would exacerbate her pain. Even now, I believe we should be patient and compassionate toward our sisters in Christ who struggle with infertility because I watched such a special friend suffer so deeply.

And I admit to having mixed feelings now, as many of my friends have become grandmothers. I get tempted toward jealousy when my sister talks about her adventures with her grandchildren. It’s strange, but I feel more upset about not being a granny than about not being a mom. Will someone explain that one to me?

The apostle Paul instructs us to weep with those who weep (Romans 12:15). How often I wish that more Christians would obey that command, especially around their childless sisters on Mother’s Day. Many pastors preach on the glories of motherhood, which is good in our culture that demeans stay-at-home moms. But those sermons, while important, can make childless women feel like failures. Therefore, we must show sensitivity to them, especially on Mother’s Day!

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Teaching The (Usually) Easy Part

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John, although he has his moments, is very easy to love. The thought of needing an older woman to teach me to cultivate affectionate feelings towards him amuses me, because those feelings come without much effort on my part. Hopefully most of my married readers can say the same thing about their husbands.

Sadly, many wives don’t have this sort of testimony. Sadder still, even Christian marriages can struggle, with wives experiencing difficulty maintaining affection for their husbands and children. We’ll get to reasons for such problems momentarily, but first we need to go back to Titus 1 for a look at the culture in Crete. Understanding the people Paul originally directed his instructions to gives us clarity on how his instructions apply to 21st Century Christian wives.

In Titus 1, Paul commissioned Titus to appoint elders across the island nation of Crete. These elders would need the ability to deal with troublemakers, whether those who taught false doctrine or those who lived in self-indulgence. Paul reminded Titus that the inhabitants of that island generally lived in flagrant rebellion against God’s laws.

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Teaching What Is Good — Comma, Colon Or Both?

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I nearly failed Latin in college, so I easily decided against taking classes in Classical Greek. Therefore, I don’t claim to know much about the Greek manuscripts of the New Testament. As I write this series on Titus 2:3-5, I sort of wish I did know Greek, since the construction of the sentence would probably deepen my understanding.

3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. (NASB95)

Verse 3, after describing the character qualities older women should exhibit, commissions us to teach what is good. The translators of the New American Standard Bible 1995 indicate that teaching what is good includes the topics listed in verses 4 and 5 by using the phrase, “so that.” This rendering helps us determine that the primary purpose for older women to teach younger women to focuses on encouraging those younger women to be wives and mothers who honor the Lord. Most definitely, we should maintain this goal at all cost!

But does this passage limit us to teaching domestic skills? If Paul had written Titus 2:3-5 in present day American English, would he have placed a comma or a colon after the word “good?”

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Did The Proverbs 31 Woman Violate Titus 2?

DebbieLynne Kespert2 Comments

Bible believing Christians should all agree that a wife’s first and overriding responsibility must be to her home and family. Paul’s words to Titus make this point abundantly clear.

 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. ~~Titus 2:3-5 (NASB)

A Christian wife and mother must subject her personal desires and aspirations to the needs of her husband and children. And yes, ladies, that self-sacrifice includes homeschooling children. At least during child-rearing years (and when circumstances allow), a mother should set her career aside in favor of her children.

As we look at the business ventures of the Proverbs 31 woman, therefore, let’s keep in mind that neither I nor the writer of that section of Proverbs would advocate for a woman to seek a career at the expense of her family.

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They Taught Him To Love Jesus

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In Paul’s second letter to Timothy, the apostle prepares his young disciple to assume the role of pastor to the church at Ephesus. In encouraging Timothy, he makes a tender appeal reminding the young man of his spiritual heritage handed down from his mother and grandmother.

I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.~~2 Timothy 1:5 (ESV)

Further on in the letter, Paul specifies what Timothy learned from these women.

14 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it 15 and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work. ~~2 Timothy 3:14-17 (ESV)

Lois and Eunice, I believe, taught young Timothy more than a mere academic knowledge of the Old Testament. Their faith in Yahweh prepared him to receive the Gospel and to love the Lord Jesus Christ.

Whether or not you were raised by a godly mother, knowing Scripture will reveal Christ to you. The more you see Him in His Word, the more you will never love Him as Timothy’s grandmother and mother did. Truly, they taught him to love Jesus.

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Don’t Feel Guilty For Being A Stay-At-Home Mom

DebbieLynne KespertLeave a comment

Mom and KidsThe pressure began in the 1970s with a reaction to Betty Friedan’s 1963 book, The Feminine Mystique. Friedan asserted that society had conditioned housewives against recognizing their boredom and “quiet desperation.” Women, she said, should want more.

All too quickly, succeeding generations of women came to frown upon the idea that stay-at-home moms could possibly be fulfilled. No, society now said, women need outside careers — in addition to being wives and mothers — if we want to have satisfying lives. Stay-at-home moms deserve pity. Or scorn.

Usually scorn.

As the daughter of a single mom, I certainly understand that some women have to work outside the home. Others may believe that, in order to maintain their standard of living, they can’t afford to stay home (an attitude that should demand serious questioning). If a husband wants his wife to contribute to the household income, that wife may need to submit to his wishes by getting a job. As Christians, we should Read More »

A Mother’s Satisfaction

DebbieLynne Kespert2 Comments

Jen's first Easter
My sister’s first Easter

In 1953, she joyfully walked out of her office for the last time. Her fondest dream had come true! At age 37, she finally would carry a baby to term, softening the pain of her three failed pregnancies.

Even though the baby was born with severe disabilities, she rejoiced to be a mom. When a second baby came two-and-a-half years later (this time perfectly healthy), she happily settled into her role of stay-at-home mom. Sure, she served in United Cerebral Palsy and March of Dimes, as well as local women’s groups. She even signed up to lead her older daughter’s Girl Scout troop. But she loved being home with her little girls. It was all she ever wanted!

Late in 1963, she accompanied her husband on a working vacation to San Diego, leaving the girls with they grandmother for the week. It was the first time they had gone anywhere without the kids. After her husband’s conference, they took a day in Tijuana, Mexico — of course, buying Read More »

Fearing The God I Love

DebbieLynne KespertLeave a comment

Jacksonville 1955
Mom and me in Jacksonville, Florida ~~ 1955

Have you read through Proverbs lately? Throughout the book, Solomon writes about various benefits of fearing God. For instance, he writes:

26 In the fear of the Lord one has strong confidence,
    and his children will have a refuge.
27 The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life,
    that one may turn away from the snares of death. ~~Proverbs 14:26-27 (ESV)

Sadly, 21st Century evangelicals have difficulty accepting the idea of fearing God, preferring to emphasize Read More »

Saturday Sampler: April 21 — April 27

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Flourishes02

The Easter attacks in Sri Lanka prompted Stephen McAlpine to write When The Silence Is As Deafening As the Explosions. I’ve been saying since the inception of my blog that Christians must expect persecution — McAlpine underscores this reality in his post as well as discussing the world’s reluctance to report on it.

I’ve also been saying for quite some time that Biblical discernment entails so much more than calling out false prophets. In The Mailbag: Vaxxers, Anti-Vaxxers, and the Health of the Body, Michelle Lesley uses practical application of Scripture to address heated debates about vaccinations.

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A Chosen Race, A Royal Priesthood, A Holy Nation by Hohn Cho of Pyromaniacs addresses several crucial issues from a Biblical perspective. It’s a sterling example of how discernment operates.

I like SharaC’s thought that Easter isn’t the end, but the beginning. Her devotional post, Jesus On The Beach, appears in Into the Foolishness of God.

Once again,  Possessing the Treasure includes Mike Ratliff’s insightful exegesis with Worldly Wisdom vs. God’s Absolute Truth. If you want to learn ways of handling Scripture properly, look no further. More importantly, Mike builds a solid case for God’s sovereignty in electing people to salvation.

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Although John and I couldn’t have children, we support our friends who have big families. It pains me to hear people (especially Christians) make judgmental remarks about them. So James Faris’ Do You Know What Causes This?! in Gentle Reformation encourages and refreshes me. Whether you’re a mom to several children or a critic of large families, please read this one.

Elizabeth Prata of The End Time observes The fallout from a hyper-casual generation (of pastors). She takes a hard line without resorting to legalism, an attitude which only strengthens her case. And it’s a case well worth presenting. While you’re on her website,  check out The days of Christian persecution in America are coming.

In Context Matters: I Never Knew You; Depart From Me, Peter Krol sharpens our understanding of arguably one of the most frightening statements Jesus ever uttered. Besides demonstrating how to interpret the meaning of a Bible verse by its context, Krol augments our ability to discern whether or not someone is a false teacher. Krol blogs for Knowable Word.

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